I really do love that Johnny Cash song. And although I am not coming down from being stoned or drunk, I am coming down from the baby mania that has been sweeping over my family and taking control of my weekends.
I am going to be an aunt for the first time in July. I am excited to meet my sweet little L, but I may need a break from looking at tiny outfits and hearing older moms stay in awe of how many bottle choices there are "now a days".
I'm in a very different place in my life, no where near baby mode. Sometimes I think I may be on the highway going in reverse while everyone else is in fifth gear. And if I let myself, I will become sad- or even worse- start the endless game of what ifs and longing for the left big life stage. Because that would make me happy and whole, right?
Wrong.
When I was in middle school, I remember thinking that my life was going to be much better if I could just get to high school. Then in high school I convinced myself that college was where it was at and I just HAD to get there. After years at college , all I wanted was out! Once I graduated, then life would be legit and there would be much rejoicing!
As I sit on my couch as a college graduate I can honestly say that it would be easy to sit and long for a husband, a house, maybe even a puppy. And if we are being completely honest, I do that on occasion. It would admittedly be nice. But I can't allow myself to live in the what ifs.
I'm trying to live my life in the moment. Where I am at right now in life is pretty awesome. I spend my free time (when I'm not committed to attending or throwing a shower) doing literally whatever I want. I can go to concerts and plan road trips on a whim. I can play my new Neil Young album over and over again with no one protesting. And I can play it was loud as I want.
I guess what I'm trying to say is those weren't the good ol' days, or those will be the best days of my life - THESE are the days!
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